Pervading Theme at the COC: "The Truth Will Set You Free"

Have you ever been there? The family has excused themselves to go enjoy a favorite TV program in another room without you. You are sitting alone in the kitchen, the lights are out. In front of you is a clump of cold food. It may be yams or liver or okra. Your mother has laid down the line that you must eat it, because it is good for you and it will help your body grow strong and healthy. You have attempted to follow her instructions, to chew and then to swallow, but something beyond your control happens each time you try to slide it down the hatch. Your body is thrown into a quivering defense mode and immediately moves to evict the vile intruder.

All of us are about as eager to face the pain inside of us as we are to swallow food that makes us gag. It often doesn't seem to matter that there are those who tell us it is good for us and it will help us to grow strong and healthy. A pervading challenge for us at the COC is to make facing pain, more palatable for our guests.

We want to lovingly assault the blame casting and denial that keeps people stuck in bondage. Casting blame and denying personal responsibility for life, are two responses to life, we very often see. There is no hope of healing without honesty. There is no growth without admitting our hurts, hang-ups and habits.

The following is a theme that flavors all the teaching ministry at the Community Outreach Center. Jesus said, "The truth will set you free."

There are obviously many approaches to this passage. There are many powerful and biblical messages that could come from this foundational statement. In this ministry a large focus is placed on the vital need for honesty.

"The truth will set you free" Telling the truth to be set free. Tell the truth to ourselves...to God and to significant others. There is no healing without honesty.

"The truth will set you free" "Learning to be real about who we are, where we are, and what we feel. To be real about our pain and our responsibility to own our stuff."¹

We tell people that there is no hope for change in any person who is not willing to be honest about what is really going on inside.

Proverbs 28:13 says, "He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy."

Assaulting the Denial and Blame Games

In a huge way, so very many of our guests are in bondage...are stuck...in a rut...chained or crippled because they are in some form of denial or blame casting. To keep the pain, the hurts and the hang-ups hidden, they often medicate themselves and tell themselves they are alright. Or they medicate themselves and blame everyone else around them for why they can't live any other way.

One guy we will describe without mentioning a name represents the way so many of our people handle their issues. This guy never has a problem finding a place to live. He experiences frequent but usually brief periods of homelessness. His problem is not finding a roof over his head. His problem is keeping the roof over his head.²Every time this guy ends up back on the street we can count on hearing some of the following...

• "I left because they didn't understand me...They didn't like me..."
• "They were out to get me from the start...They were unreasonable..."
• "They placed way too many demands on me...They were unfair and unkind."
• "I can't live in that place - they made it like hell for me..."
• "They made living there like living with the devil and his demons..."
• "They wouldn't let me live...smoke...stay up late"
• "They don't know how to run a clean and sober house...I could run it better."³

Common denominator -"They...they...they...they!"

We have never heard this guy say anything that would suggest he ever had anything to do with the expulsions.

We want to effectively expose the thinking, so deeply ingrained in so many of our guests, that always blames others for every negative condition in life. We need to encourage, exhort, persuade, admonish and challenge our guests to take personal ownership for their problems. People need to stop the denial and the blame games and honestly face who they are and where they are in life. There is no hope for them otherwise.

We know some things in life are not our fault. Some things happen to us that we had no control over. Much of our life is what has been handed to us and we had no choice about what we got, but we are responsible for what we do with it. We are responsible with what we do with what we got.

People have to see Hope before they will face their pain

Some people are so bruised by life (things done to them and things they do to themselves) that they are numb and deaf to the idea of any hope for themselves. We have found that as we repetitiously proclaim the truth in messages like the following...(These are past sermon themes) "God is a God of hope...God loves us in spite of us...Nothing with Him is hopeless...God can and desires to restore what the locusts have eaten...God can and desires to restore buried dreams and purposes...God can and desires to resurrect dead things..." more and more people are daring to believe them. People won't begin dealing with their pain unless they dare to believe good can come out of it...that there is hope.

There is no hope for healing in our lives unless we are willing to be real about the pain in our lives. This is kind of a dichotomy. People have no hope unless they deal with reality inside themselves. Yet people won't deal with reality inside themselves unless they do have some hope. Preaching the love of God...the hope in God...and the power of God must be coupled with the exhortation to face the truth about ourselves.

Great Fear Among so Many at the COC

There is great fear among so many at the COC.

Very many are crippled with the fear of facing reality...the fear of facing the truth about themselves. I was walking by a local liquor store and I peeked in as I walked by. My eyes connected with a guy I knew who was in the process of buying some beer. He looked stunned and embarrassed that I had seen him and immediately left the beer on the counter and walked away to talk with me. The clerk was left standing behind the counter waiting for payment. For about 5 minutes we stood outside the store talking. I knew this guy. We had had several conversations in the past while he was very drunk. I knew he was rarely sober and he knew that I knew this. I'm not sure completely why he felt so embarrassed on this occasion. As we talked I shared about God's amazing love and power and I encouraged this guy to dare to believe God would help him to get on the healing path and show him what purpose his life would have. He became silent and thoughtful and I waited to see what he would say. It seemed like he was really thinking about the hope for change that God gives. Then he spoke and this is what he said, "I can't...I know I have pain inside and I'm afraid to face it. There is hurt and pain so severe and so deep I'm afraid that if I let it up and let it out, it will take over and I will snap and hurt myself and/or others. So I keep it down. I keep myself medicated. I have to drink. I have no choice."

This guy put in words the sentiments of so many of our guests. There is great pain and incredible fear to face the pain.

Please help us pass the Words of Jesus..."The Truth will set you free!" Together, as we point to the freedom there is in Christ and we challenge, encourage, exhort, persuade and plead with people to tell the truth to themselves, to God and to significant others, we will see great things happen for God's glory at the COC.

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Footnotes:

¹There are many passages of scripture that show the importance of humility and honesty. Many of them are directly related to personal healing in life. Here are just a few. These passages relate well to the theme being promoted at the COC. James 4:6-10; James 5:16; 1 John 1:9; 1 John 1:7-10; Psalms 32:3-5; Proverbs 28:13; Is 1:18-20; Proverbs 22:4; Isaiah 57:15; Micah 6:8; 1 Peter 5:6; Matthew 11:29; The example of a most wicked man - King Manasseh and God's response after his honest humility in 2 Chronicles 33:12-13; God's healing hand at the response of another wicked King Rehoboam in 2 Chronicles 12:6-8; God's mercy on Josiah after his honest humility in 2 Chronicles 34:27-28; The honesty and humility of the prodigal in Luke 15:18; David's classic honesty and humility in Psalms 51:4; Psalms 51:17; 2 Chronicles 7:14; Luke 14:11; Luke 18:9-14.(back)

²Much like many of our guests when it comes to a job. For many of our guests their problem is not getting a job, it is keeping the job they get. Job retention is a big problem. Many say their greatest need is to work, but for most this is not their greatest need. Their greatest need is to deal with the stuff that so often sabotages their ability to retain a job. They need to face the truth and get out of denial.(back)

³Here is a list of other comments we hear related to the blame casting and denial so prevalent among COC guests. "It was my parents' fault!" "The employer was unfair...unjust...prejudice...a bigot...did drugs...was inconsistent!" "My wife was a nag!" "I never had a chance because my parents didn't love me!" "My parents did drugs!" "I was molested as a child and never had a chance!" Upon investigation we have discovered that many of the blame game comments are distorted and untrue. They are fabrications used to help justify not facing personal issues...personal responsibility. Some of the statements are true. Unfair and ungodly things happen to people. Hurtful and tragic things happen that batter...bruise and beat people emotionally...spiritually and physically. We need to weep with these people and then lovingly help them to face their issues. We can lovingly help them to accept the responsibility they have to deal with their own stuff and we can encourage them to learn to move on. Otherwise these things keep people stuck in a rut they never leave. The pain of life buries people and many never recover. No one will ever recover without honestly acknowledging personal pain and without learning to look to God for help. "The truth will set you free."(back)